My name is Suki, my human is a writer, and this is about my world. The world according to Suki The Cat. My humans smell funny, look weird, and I can't understand a thing they say, but they feed me, so hey, what are you gonna do?
My little brother Salem runs up to me with the goofiest grin I ever saw on his face.
He comes to a stop right in front of me and giggles, “Did you know your stomach can’t digest a ball of yarn?”
I stare at him blankly.
Then he grins, “Ask me how I know.”
I hear a banging sound and it’s interrupting my naptime. I go into the dining room and my little brother Salem is scratching and pounding on the bedroom door.
“Why are you pounding on the door?”
“Because our human closed it.”
“So?”
“So?! So?! What if she’s eating tuna and playing with a new catnip toy in there?”
I lift my paw, “Let me help you.”
My little brother Salem runs up to me all excited, “I caught this lizard.” He lifts his paw just enough to show the reptile squirming underneath. “Can we keep him?”
“What for?”
“I tore the tip of his tail off and I want to see if it grows back.”
I glare at him, “Remember the butterfly?”
“For the last time, I thought his wings were velcroed on.”
All I can hear is our human yelling in the laundry room. I look over at Salem, “What. Did. You. Do?”
He shrugs his shoulders, “I just used the litter box.”
“Well, did you cover good?”
“Not in the ‘traditional’ sense,” he averts his eyes.
“Well…” I tap my paw and wait.
“There may have been a blouse sitting outside the litter box that got pulled in when I was scratching.”
I hear a low, guttural sound coming from the other room when my little brother Salem walks in.
“Were you just throwing up?” I ask.
“Oh yeah. Luckily, I made it to the sofa just in time.”
“Nice,” I nod. “Our human tried to get me to yak into the sink once. It was weird.”
“Ew. I sleep in there.”
Salem looked at me scratching his head, “I don’t understand our human. She kept moving me every time I sat down.”
“That is weird.”
“I know, right? If she didn’t want me to sit in front of her, why did she keep setting her book down?”
My little brother Salem asked me one day, “Why did that guy Schrodinger put his cat in a box?”
“To show the absurdity that waves (particles) collapse only once observed.”
“So what makes them collapse?”
“They’ll figure it out once they hear that tree in the forest fall.”
Salem scratches his head, “I’ll bet there were treats in the box.”
