For the Physicists Out There

My little brother Salem asked me one day, “Why did that guy Schrodinger put his cat in a box?”

“To show the absurdity that waves (particles) collapse only once observed.”

“So what makes them collapse?”

“They’ll figure it out once they hear that tree in the forest fall.”

Salem scratches his head, “I’ll bet there were treats in the box.”

For the Neuroscientists Out There

I walk up to my little brother Salem and hold out my left paw containing tuna treats and bitch slap him with my right paw.

“What’d you do that for?” he asks, rubbing his cheek.

“My right brain said ‘give him a treat’ but my left brain said ‘slap him’ and the left brain won.” I shrug my shoulders as I walk away, “Sorry. You can’t argue with neuroscience.”