My little brother Salem has the IQ of a moth, God love him, but conversations with him can make me want to scratch my eyes out. He typically does all the talking while I tend to stare at him in stunned silence. They go like this:
Salem: “When do you think dinner is?” His eyes glaze over and he looks around anxiously.
Me: I stare at him blankly.
Salem: His foot twitches, “What do you think is going to be for lunch? I’m hungry now. I sure could go for a little something.”
Me: Your breath stinks.
Salem: His eyes dart around, “What kind of treats do you think she has today? I want tuna. Do you like tuna? Maybe chicken. I like chicken. No, I think salmon is my fave. Do you like Salmon? What time is dinner again?”
Me: I bore my eyes into him, if you don’t shut up I’m going to pull out all your whiskers and beat you with my feather on a stick! #ShutUpShutUpShutUp